Hi, I’m Kristina!

I’m a native New Yorker living in Central Florida. And before you ask… YES, I am a Disney adult. I’m also a yogi, a freelance social media manager, and a professional shit-talker.

I’m a Sagittarius sun, Scorpio moon, and Leo rising. For my rare Human Design people, I’m a 6/2 Self-Projected Projector. I spent a decade of my life as a makeup artist working in the beauty industry before burning it all down during COVID when I tried to become a dating/business/life coach. LOL. That’s a story for another time.

If I were going to the electric chair, my final meal would probably be a medium-rare ribeye with melted butter for dipping, Parmesan truffle fries with garlic aioli for dipping (I like dips, okay?), and a filthy dirty martini with blue cheese-stuffed olives. I am just like the other girls.

If I could have a drink with anyone, dead or alive, it would be Anthony Bourdain. And if I were on a deserted island and could only bring one thing with me, it would be my iPhone. Stop lying, you would, too.

I was once told my writing style is a cross between Bridget Jones and Gabby Windey, with a dash of Tucker Max if he were a woman who wasn’t an asshole. Basically, I’m not very PC and I tell it how it is. Not in a boomer way, just in a “let’s all stop pretending we’re perfect” way.

If that sounds like your vibe, please stick around. If you wanna stalk follow me on social media, you can find me at @kristina_nasti on IG and TikTok.